I do... Do I?

He felt his shirt become tight around the collar, his tie felt too tight, he needed air and yet he knew it was fine, this was nothing, it was just nerves.
He had to remember to breath, that was all, just breath through it all and it will be fine.  He agreed to this, he wanted this, he wanted for this to happen, for them all to be happy and get the happily ever after that they deserved.

What do you deserve?

He heard it, the voice in the back of his mind and he tried to push it back.  Now was not a time to be thinking about himself, now was a time to think of others.  His shoes were polished, his outfit was perfect, his tie was straight, his hair was perfect.
He just needed to head to the church now and go through with it.

A case of the nerves?

He knew that was true, he was nervous, he was making a big commitment here, but he would get through with it, his father told him that it was scary yet once it was over it was fine.
He would manage it.

Really? You think it will be plan sailing from here on out?

He tried to push the thoughts away, and yet they kept coming, a dam had been opened and he couldn’t stop it.

There is no going back, you do this and you can’t come back.

You heard your dad, is he happy in his marriage?

Can you care for the children if you do break up?

You will break her heart in the end.

This isn’t the real you.

You want your parents to be proud of you, to be the masked man you have always been.

You are lying to yourself.

You are destroying yourself.

Don’t do this.

The last voice startled him, the voice was of someone he knew really well, his lover, the one he truly wanted to be with.

He couldn’t go back though, he had to do this, his parents expected it of him, could he shame them? Destroy them?

Come to me my love.

That voice was calling to him, he didn’t have long to get to the church, he had to go, he had to get married.

He took a deep breath and looked down at the envelope, he picked it up, sealed it and kissed it.

“I’m sorry Daniel,” He said softly, putting it down and leaving the house, determined that he would get through this, he would lead the life expected of him, he would have a family and be normal.